Having sex is fun, but trying to have a baby is probably one of the most stressful times in the life of a couple. While some are able to conceive easily, for others it is a waiting game that tests one’s patience like no other. So what can you do to make the process of ‘baby making’ more fun and successful? Here are some tips that work!
Tips to help you conceive:
While there are a number of myths about baby making – you must’ve heard many from your friendly neighborhood aunty to that nosy relative of yours who seem to know what you should do between the sheets – there are some basics that are the GMP (good manufacturing practices) of baby making. So, here goes:
Deep penetration: You must ensure that there is maximum penetration. This is because the tip of the penis should ideally be as close to the cervix as possible, helping shorten the distance sperms have to travel.
Let gravity do its job: Ideally you should aim to reduce the amount of work sperm has to do to get to the egg. Try not going against gravity, and give your pelvis a little tilt to make their journey a little easier.
Be stress free: This is one the most important factors in conception. Stress makes your body release a number of hormones that are counterproductive to conception, not to mention causing your body to tense up and making the vagina more rigid; taking away all the fun from having sex. Before you scoff at the idea, consider this – a study conducted by the University of Oxford found that the enzymes and hormones released while a woman is stressed reduces the chances of her getting pregnant by up to 12%, even during her most fertile period. So relax with some deep breathing, yoga or simply by pampering yourself.
Have fun and orgasm: This one is for the men. A number of scientists say that it is not imperative for a woman to orgasm in order to have a baby. They are right, reproduction does take its course (after all those ‘almost pregnant’ moments when you least wanted it, you know it’s true) but making your woman have an orgasm has its own benefits. For starters, it makes her happy, opens up and dilates her cervix, lubricates her vagina and makes the uterus and vagina contract. All these factors put together are the perfect recipe for baby making. Not to mention the fact that the tiny contractions along the vaginal wall and uterus help the sperm move along towards the uterus.
Sex positions for conception:
Missionary: The most common position, the missionary style of sex does have its benefits. In this position the woman lies on her back, with the man is on top. The fact that her pelvis is not tilted to face downwards helps the sperm move closer to the cervix helping in conception and the man has a great leeway to achieve better penetration. It also helps the couple feel closer, and most importantly makes the woman feel more connected to her man. Guys can slip in a little bit of naughtiness into this position for that added pleasure by talking dirty or by simply looking into the lady’s eyes while making love.
Read how to master the missionary position properly
Read how to master the missionary position properly
Glowing triangle: This pose is an offshoot of the missionary position. Here the man is on top with the woman below, the difference being that the man is on all fours with his legs extended out. The woman’s pelvis is raised (you can use a pillow for that added lift) and wrapped around the man. This position helps in increasing the depth of the penetration and helps tilt the woman’s pelvis upwards. The best part about this position is that the man need not move. The woman can do all the work.
The rock and roller or anvil: Something like the missionary, this position ensures that you penetrate deep, hit your woman’s G spot and help in conception while having a ‘rocking’ good time. In this position the woman is on her back and the man is on top. The woman then raises her legs such that they are above her head and the man penetrates. (Read: The Anvil: Hit the G-spot with this advanced sex position)
Doggy style: A great position – and most men will agree they love it – the doggy style is great for baby making. Apart from all the fun you can have with it, doggy style helps increase the amount of penetration and opens up the cervix just a little bit more than other positions. This position checks all the boxes in our sex for conception check list.
Magic mountain: This pose is just like the doggy style, but has the man bending over the woman, such that her back is against his chest. You can make the sex even more pleasurable by hugging as you have sex. Here, the woman is bent over at the waist, and can use pillows beneath her to stabilise her upper body. You can reduce the number of pillows to increase the bend in the woman’s waist helping her pelvis tilt even more. This pose allows for deep penetration, hits the G spot, stimulates the clitoris and is perfect for baby making.
Spooning: Another common position with great benefits. With the man behind the woman as they lie down, this pose ensures that the sperms reach the cervix as the woman’s pelvis is tilted at the right position. You can try variants of this pose where the woman’s legs are spread open and rest on the outer surface of the man’s thighs. This not only adds to the spice of this position it helps you hold her really close. (Read: Top sex positions: Spooning)
Positions for the adventurous kind:
So you have been together for a long time and that spark has long since been extinguished. There is no reason to make having sex and conception another chore that you have to check off your list of to-dos. Here are some poses you could try to help things along:
Plough: In this position the woman is literally standing on her hands, with her legs in the air. The man gets between her legs, holding her legs with his hands – just like you would a wheel barrow. This position is hot in a very risqué way but it will definitely ensure you both have a lot of fun while at it. As an added bonus it helps in greater G-spot stimulation and better penetration.
Butterfly: This position ensures you get out of the bedroom and try having sex in other parts of the house (just make sure your shades are drawn). In this position the woman lies on her back on a table. The man steps in between her feet and raises her hips with his hands (you could add pillows for that added lift). This position raises the raunchy quotient of your sex life, ensuring better penetration and helps the sperms stay in the vagina. If nothing else this position is sure to leave you with some really amazing memories for the future.
After sex:
Cuddle: When you are done with the act, it is a good idea to simply lie and cuddle. Before the men out there protest about how they would rather not, here is the reasoning behind it. During an orgasm and after sex a woman releases a powerful hormone. Unlike men, who simply release dopamine or the ‘feel good hormone’, women release oxytocin or the ‘cuddle hormone’. This hormone makes a woman want to bond with her partner. It also has other benefits – it is responsible for streamlining her reproductive cycle, helps by giving her the biological need to care for her baby, assists the birthing process and starts the lactation or milk production cycle as well. So when you cuddle after having had a good time between the sheets, it helps in the production and sustenance of oxytocin, making the woman more able to conceive. Another great reason is that cuddling simple helps you both bond and feel good. If all else fails it might lead to some more fun.
Lie down: Another thing that women can do is to lie down with their legs up in the air with their pelvis raised off the bed. To make the insemination process more efficient she can place a few pillows below her lower back to help keep the sperms in the vagina longer and prevent it from flowing out. Although there are a large amount of sperm in one ejaculate, that are enough to impregnate a woman, staying stationary for a while after ejaculation is a good way to help the process along.
Finally, sex should be fun, exciting and sensuous. Enjoy every moment of it and watch the pregnancy test turn positive the next time you try.
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